BlogYYY
Friday, May 23, 2008,2:39 PM
Mask
I cannot help but feel that I'm wearing a mask every day. Had a chat with a close friend in school today and he told me that if i had not shared my worries, anxieties and troubles with him, he wouldn't have known what i'm facing given the front that put up in school. The usual smiley me. Based on what he said, I've come to conclude that people do LITERALLY take us at face value. If we look happy, then we are deemed to be happy. I try to look happy because i would like to try my best to be as professional as i can. But this often gets misinterpreted that all is well, VERY WELL. This assumption can be so totally wrong.
I'm breaking down inside. From what's happening @ home. No one knows, no one understands. Only told bro when is saw her the other day for a haircut. She somehow was more able to see things from a more objective point of view. Sigh.
My husband feels that school is taking way too many long weekends away from me, the optional activities i mean. But i'm unable to express this concern to those in school. No one understands. People who have perfect families, perfect husbands, perfect spouses prob won't even understand what I'm trying to articulate.
Anyway, enough being said. For now, I only choose to seek solace in God, for he is but the only one who truly listens, truly understands, and is truly THERE...
Monday, May 5, 2008,9:28 PM
Anticipation
This is an exciting week. I would have known him for 10 years this Wednesday and as i look back, it has really been 10 really long years of ups and downs. I've never regretted this path I've taken. Crazy quarrels with mum and family, just because of him. Well, looking beack, the reward is sweet and it's really getting better as the years go by, now that he's a part of our family.
To celebrate our 10th year together, he says he would like to try Breeze @ Scarlet. Made the reservations liao. Sounds kinda ... interesting. Well, shall see what happens on Wed. Looking forward for the day to come to celebrate with him.